absolute surrender means letting go.

for so long now I've had these clenched fists, holding onto whatever I can because I barely hold anything.
a new discovery: i hold nothing.

i am a little girl, just weeping, with no strength left- i look around and there is nothing that i can cling to, but there is my Father who is greater than the ocean of all my tears who picks me up and holds me in His comforting arms.

when everything falls apart He is everything- He is everything because I stand emptyhanded, I have no money, no job, no vehicle,no lover, nothing material that I can claim- yet He claims me.
He is my only hope. so as long as he holds on to me, I know i will be ok. and will he ever let go?

yeah , that's rhetorical.
i was just reminded of my Savior's love for me over the past few days as I have been mulling over my circumstances. This love conquers everything, it covers all the hurt I've ever experienced and clothes me with joy.
This next week is VBS at my church and then on Thursday I will travel up to Portland with a couple of my roomies from Italy to a wedding and then on Sunday I will head up to Guemes Island with my fam and the Phelps, a little island practically in Canada in the San Juans just for a getaway for about a week- I'm pretty stoked to see the beautiful Esther Perry and Stever-muffin too:)

God is good.